When Our Kids Inherit Our Own Insecurities: My Daughter Hates Her Curly Hair
I was getting my daughter Bina ready for preschool the other morning, when she burst into tears. “I don’t like my hair,” she said. “I want it to be straight like Ava’s!” Ava, my boyfriend’s seven-year-old daughter, has enviably straight and thick hair, the kind any woman would love to have. Any woman, including my four-year-old. “Your hair is beautiful!” I responded in what I hoped was a natural voice. “I love your curls!” But my daughter, who already has a no-bullshit stance on life, was not having it that day. “Well I don’t like them!” she responded. “When can I make my hair straight?” I looked at her, with her hopeful eyes, and sighed. “You can make your hair straight when you’re older, in a few years,” I said, hoping that answer would suffice as I put a bow in her hair. And for that morning, it did. This wasn’t the first time we’d had this conversation. The topic comes up regularly, usually in the mornings when I am doing her hair for school. Without warning, she’ll start c